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Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Sat Dec 01, 2018 7:14 am
by elementary28
So, I've seen this idea thrown around sometimes here (long time lurker, hi!) and I was arguing with myself if such a dating app needs to exist.
I'm a professional programmer and setting things up wouldn't be a big deal.

But wouldn't such a place be dominated by men? All dating apps seem to be heavily biased towards men and I'm afraid the ration would be very unbalanced. Maybe AO should just be an option but it should be just focused on anal instead?

There seem to be some anal dating sites around but they all seem to redirect to existing sex ads or just feel empty or even fake/scummy.

I'd launch a clean site, no ads, no scammy payments, just straightforward profiles with fake check.

Any thoughts?

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Sat Dec 01, 2018 7:40 am
by analsexonly
No, it would be a disaster.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Sat Dec 01, 2018 10:02 pm
by LibertineReprobate
Something like that *might* work if you were to build it like a hybrid between match.com and fetlife.com. In other words, have new members fill out something like one of those kink checklists which asks about all kinds of kinky play, scenarios, toys, sex acts, and fetishes—and has the person rank each kink on a scale that usually looks something like:
1 “no way / hard limit”
2 “Not interested in it / soft limit”
3 “I’m curious about it but never tried it”
4 “neutral: I’ve done it before / I would do it if my partner wanted or needed it”
5 “I like it”
6 “I love it/ need this to feel sexually fulfilled” —
(the aim of those worksheets is to put play partners on the same page and keep from going beyond what both partners are consenting to.

“Anal only” could be one of many questions asked, and the backend algorithm would only match people fitting their sexual orientation and in line with each other’s kinks/fetishes/interests.

The only way this would work, though, is if you had some method of verifying members that still respected a reasonable level of privacy and was secure.

Fetlife is overtly NOT a personals site where people go to find a partner—it’s more like a Facebook of kinksters...and most of the dating / hookup sites for kink (eg, colarspace) are awash with bots, catfish, and prostitutes, such that finding a partner who matches your interests is easier done by slowly getting to know other kinksters in the local scene and happening upon someone who is also into what you’re into, and is also looking for a partner.

So...it would likely be a pretty big undertaking to build all that beep-boop on the backend—at least as far as I think I understand multivariate coding for human sexual matchmaking— while also making certain your practice/process of vetting and verifying users strikes the Goldilocks balance between fair, non-invasive, thorough, secure, private, and...sane.

...‘Cause you’re gonna get a variety of decent, eligible singles making use of your service...but you’d also get a lot of crazy people —looking to act out their craziness upon your member base— beating down the doors on a dating site like that.

Oh, and lawyer up—cause you WILL get sued by users...and if you accidently manage to let someone slip through the vetting process who is engaging in prostitution or “Sex trafficking” and is using your site to conduct business without your knowledge...that’s now a federal crime with prison time due to the FOSTA bill that became law in April this year in the US. (It’s the reason craigslist removed all their personals ad sections)

So...uh...damn. Good luck and Godspeed.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Wed Dec 05, 2018 8:56 pm
by gromm
Holy shit LibertineReprobate, you so totally nailed that answer, said everything I was going to, and did a better job of it.

Yeah, literally getting out of the house and hanging out in sex-positive spaces works far better than even Grindr, which is supposedly notorious for allowing people to hook up at breathtaking speed, yet which personally I've had absolutely no luck with.

So... all dating sites suck. Even the best of them are far worse than just getting out and making friends.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Sat Jun 20, 2020 3:38 pm
by Sideguy4U
I wouldn't say it would be a disaster. It would be challenging but organizing through this site and some other sites like real anal dating and anal lover dating it might be possible to create an app.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Sat Sep 05, 2020 10:18 am
by analsexonly
Having run several anal only communities that are explicitly not set up for dating, the biggest issues we tend to have are people who try to use it for dating and the bad behavior that comes from that.

Dating sites that are set up for sexual niches consistently run into issues of men being the primary users and women who may be just as interested in finding a partner in that niche getting overwhelmed with unwanted attention in an amplified version of what normal dating apps and sites are like: men spam every woman with messages, women get hundreds of messages and lose interest because they get tired of sifting through low quality messages to find someone they might be interested in.

There are also legal challenges, because such platforms get used by sex workers and with U.S. legislation from the past few years, if it gets discovered that your website is being used to coordinate prostitution, you can get in legal trouble even if you weren't involved and it was just happening through your service.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Mon Sep 14, 2020 3:23 pm
by AnnoMundi
analsexonly wrote:
Sat Sep 05, 2020 10:18 am
Having run several anal only communities that are explicitly not set up for dating, the biggest issues we tend to have are people who try to use it for dating and the bad behavior that comes from that.

Dating sites that are set up for sexual niches consistently run into issues of men being the primary users and women who may be just as interested in finding a partner in that niche getting overwhelmed with unwanted attention in an amplified version of what normal dating apps and sites are like: men spam every woman with messages, women get hundreds of messages and lose interest because they get tired of sifting through low quality messages to find someone they might be interested in.

There are also legal challenges, because such platforms get used by sex workers and with U.S. legislation from the past few years, if it gets discovered that your website is being used to coordinate prostitution, you can get in legal trouble even if you weren't involved and it was just happening through your service.

So......., it would be basically just like every other dating site/app? Where women get hundreds of messages and lose interest because they get tired of sifting though endless messages?

Although that is not so much because dating sites are overrun with men and only a few women, but because men have to spam like basically every woman on a dating site in the hope that maybe one or two may favorably respond. Modern online dating for men in a nutshell.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Mon Sep 21, 2020 1:54 am
by adventurista
It would be nice to see but as everyone has said, if it is set up as a commercial venture doomed to fail because the market is so niche. If it was set up as a 'maybe break even' venture it might work. But I would set it up so men and women can join, but only women can send first contact messages. Guys would have to work their profile to get noticed. The women can also rate men they contact on behaviour, honesty and how they act on a date (if it goes that far. Men can see their rating, but not respond. I would open it up to Transgenders as well as this is a growing market.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Fri Dec 15, 2023 5:06 pm
by hippiechick45
I think it could be a good idea. I'd try it out.

Re: Do you think an anal (only) dating app/site is worth a shot?

Posted: Mon Dec 18, 2023 5:57 am
by TelJ2003
I wouldn't have met my boyfriend on such a dating site and thanks to him I regained my interest in anal.