Just a little disappointed

General discussion of the anal only lifestyle. If it doesn't fit elsewhere or isn't a personal comment or question, it probably goes here.
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CuriousKitten
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Aug 22, 2020 3:28 pm
Gender: Female

Just a little disappointed

Post by CuriousKitten » Wed Apr 21, 2021 1:39 pm

We've never made it a full week doing anal only. I think 5 days has been our max and then he's back to my pussy and my ass gets ignored for many months.

For years before we met, I fantasize about being someone's little anal slut and having my pussy ignored completely. That doesn't seem like an option right now but does anyone have advice on convincing him to try this for more than just a few days?

tom
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Gender: Male

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by tom » Fri Apr 23, 2021 9:03 am

Hi CuriousKitten,
I am sorry about your current situation and can understand your frustration. I will tell a story that is a bit embarrassing from several years back and hopefully it will give you ideas. I dated a woman and we finally got to sex. She wanted anal. I had some experience and knew that I could hurt her if I took the lead. I am not porn star huge, but more endowed than most men and many women underestimate what they are dealing with when having first time sex with me. I try to go slow with lots of lube but almost always I regret not letting them get on top first. This time I started correctly and let her get on top. She really seemed to like it but at one point needed to change to her pussy. So I went along with it. After a while she said I could go back to her ass, but the friction was higher in her pussy and I decided to stay there. I wound up regretting that. She did not return calls and I quickly moved on. The reality is that most of my fantasizing is about anal, but it takes time for me to get off if I am not used to the woman. Most former girlfriends complain that I do not get off fast enough no matter what sex I have for the first month or so. Some girlfriends did not care if they got me off and eventually I would be the one to leave; another thing I am embarrassed to say. If you are getting him off with your anal then it may be hard to keep him interested. The film director John Waters once talked about how if you know what someone is thinking while they are masturbating, you know their ultimate fantasy. It is much like what Chris Rock jokes about when he says, “Just because you made him cum, doesn’t mean he came.” He goes on to say there is cum and there is “free at last” because you gave him exactly what he wanted. The best thing you can do is make him cum when he is in your ass but it may be impossible to convert him if he has a different ultimate fantasy. The other issue that has been referred to in other posts is the friction. If you need clitoral stimulation for you to get off, it may be harder for him to get off due to anus dilation. You may have to look into some of what is written in these forms about getting an anal orgasm, which is said to be more intense. I understand that for many women, this is easier said than done. You also may need clitoral stimulation just to get him in, something I can relate to with my size. Not to sound trite, but do your best to communicate with him. I am currently with a fine woman that I must make concessions with but we still find ways to give each other what we want. Best of luck in the journey. At least you can find some solace in the fact that most men reading this wish they had a woman who thinks and feels the way you do.

CuriousKitten
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Aug 22, 2020 3:28 pm
Gender: Female

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by CuriousKitten » Sat Apr 24, 2021 8:19 am

Thanks for the reply. This forum seems fairly dead these days.

He does enjoy anal very much and cums from it every time. He never met a woman that actually enjoyed it and asked for it before me. Apparently the few that would try it would be "ow that hurts" almost immediately and that was that. He's average and believes in taking his time and using lube so the problem was definitely not on him. He's amazing!

He's addicted to my pussy though and I get it. I love sex all around. While I still hope that someday he'll decide to give this a try, ultimately it's about me pleasing my partner and making sure his needs are met.

Colt1911
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Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by Colt1911 » Sat Apr 24, 2021 10:11 am

Sorry to hear about your experience. We’re anal only because of her orgasms. Her anal orgasms really turn me on. What if you masturbated your ass with fingers and toys and gave him a “show”? If he saw you cum, he might be interested in making you cum with his cock. I’m fortunate because my wife has spectacular anal orgasms and squirts during anal penetration. I’m thinking the more he sees you turned on, the more likely he will want to do it.

CuriousKitten
Posts: 15
Joined: Sat Aug 22, 2020 3:28 pm
Gender: Female

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by CuriousKitten » Sun Apr 25, 2021 1:37 pm

Colt1911, that might work. I used to cum so hard and fast from anal but not so much for many years. My ex husband wasn't super interested, my next partner believed it HAD to hurt me to really turn him on, and this one enjoys it a lot but loves my pussy so very much. I can't blame him though 😂

I might have to try your idea and see what happens

Drei69
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Joined: Fri Mar 23, 2018 11:47 am
Gender: Male

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by Drei69 » Wed May 05, 2021 4:12 am

Oh WOW... if only you were my wife. For someone with high sex drive that 20 years later still sees my wife and gets turned on, I must have hit the jackpot on mediocrity and boredom.

Just hit 40 and I am dying inside, honestly thinking to divorce. Not even about the anal, our sex is as shit as it comes, pretty much another chore on her to do list but I take what I can get. Stupid loyal, never messed up.

Life is too short to be with a partner that doesn't match your kinkiness... seriously. I should have broke it off years ago:( I have no idea why I am still in this relationship.

As a bonus, during Covid lockdown last year, I wanted to see how long it will go by without sex. Both stuck working from home, 2 months went by, got blue balls, I grab her in the kitchen, we have sex once, she is pregnant and now we have twin girls. Amazing little things, but all I can think of is how fucked up my life is now, I am trapped forever. Last time I had sex was... last year when she got pregnant... I think it will be another 5 years before I get anything. :lol:


Can someone get depressed and have health problems from sexual frustration and repression?

P.S. Sorry to hijack the post... just saying, if you ain't getting what you want.... gonna be 10 years later and you will hate every minute of it.
Weird thing is that she can be really crazy when she wants to... only when she wants something. This happened maybe 3 4 times in 15 years. I guess I gave her everything she wanted, so no need to do anything. Financially secured, mortgage free, got her her career, now 2 kids... I could disappear now.

MoMa
Posts: 12
Joined: Sat Aug 27, 2016 1:45 am
Gender: Male
Location: Athens, Greece

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by MoMa » Mon May 17, 2021 1:35 am

This is my story...

I was married for 19 years and never had the sex life I dreamed. The lowest point was when we were writing on the calendar when we had sex.
I was using it to point her that too many days had passed and she was using it to say "it is too early".

She didn't like blowjobs, neither anal. I was received blowjobs semi-annualy and anal sex once a year. Few times, I was doing the math on how many times I will fuck an ass until I'm 60.

I divorced in summer 2019.I lived my whole life feeliing that blowjobs and anal are bad and everytime I was receiving one, I was feeling guilty.

Fast forward to today (where I have a new fantastic relationship).

I never count, how many times I have sex during the week, because I don't know and I don't care. I'm always satisfied. Yesterday, I had 3 orgasms, 2 from deepthroat blowjobs and one from anal and the best thing is that she LOVES deepthroat and anal! There are times that i have more anal than vaginal. Never thought it would happen!

It took me some time to really rexal and believe that INDEED she likes it. Same for her, to truly relax and enjoy my love for cunnilingus!

What I want to say is that you don't need to spend your life with someone you are not compatible. I was asking my ex-wife all the time for sex and felt extreme pressure from me. It was bad for me and bad for her.

I'm happy to have met a partner who is having the same urges like me.

amaizeg
Posts: 193
Joined: Fri Mar 01, 2019 10:15 am
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Location: Netherlands

Re: Just a little disappointed

Post by amaizeg » Tue May 18, 2021 6:38 pm

I would say encourage him at every moment you can. Wear clothes that show off your ass. Put his hands there when you kiss. Rub it against him when you get close. When you blow him tell him how much you want his dick to be hard for your ass. Make him wet and slippery and tell him how you're getting him ready to take you that way. Tell him how much you want it that way, how much you need it, when he's in the heat of the moment. Take the lead and offer yourself to him. Even when he takes you in your pussy play with your ass while he does so and tell him how much you'd love for his cock to be where your fingers are.

If he doesn't respond to that he might have some hangups which make him apprehensive about anal sex and maybe you can talk it out with him.

Some guys feel a bit guilty about doing certain things, just like some women do when they are afraid that someone might think badly of them. In such cases it helps to make him feel comfortable and letting him know that he is doing the right thing to give you the most pleasure and have a hot experience himself.

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