Dating again after a long AO relationship

General discussion of the anal only lifestyle. If it doesn't fit elsewhere or isn't a personal comment or question, it probably goes here.
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Joined: Fri Sep 11, 2020 1:58 pm
Gender: Male
Location: Sweden

Dating again after a long AO relationship

Post by Painwood » Thu Jun 10, 2021 2:00 pm


I've been in an AO relationship for the past 2,5 years, which recently ended. I've just started dating again, but realized how the sexual part has become sort of bothersome. In general, I'm used to being the one introducing anal in a relationship, and truly cherish the opportunity of showing somebody else the wonderful world of anal. However, with vaginal being the norm, it's often what's expected at the start of any sort of sexual relationship. (Though I usually like to have talked about sex with someone before we sleep with eachother, for knowledge of preferences, aswell as knowing about the potential for anal. )

With anal being the main source of my lust, after getting back into the dating scene I've realized it causing a problem for me. I'm not expecting to find a girl who's into anal only from the get go, since in my experience that's something that usually evolve throughout the relationship. But my interest in vaginal is getting lower and lower, and I feel how I'm having a hard time even keeping hard unless I atleast get to finger her ass while doing vaginal. This in turn, can make me seem inpatient, which isn't the way I want to be.

I don't really know how to solve this, as the "regular" mostly vaginal at the start of seeing something has become harder and harder to perform, yet I don't see what other path to take.

Anyone got any advice, or who's been in a similar situation?

All the best,

Posts: 47
Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2021 5:43 am
Gender: Couple

Re: Dating again after a long AO relationship

Post by FMF » Wed Jun 23, 2021 8:27 am

Someone once said that "the 'good enough' was the true enemy of perfection." So many times I see people approach dating like a job interview. If you don't have a job, any job is better than no job at all.

Everyone has a kink, but not e erybody is honest enough with themselves and others to admit it. Even those who do are careful about what details they share. Only you can decide how important this (or anything) is in your life.

But if it's critical it won't happen by itself. You have to network and look under stones. Maybe you can find someone with an open mind that is willing to try something new. If that happens try to make it the "end all-be all" for her.

Good luck.


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