Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Curious about the anal only lifestyle or anal sex in general but have questions or concerns? Ask away here.
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Sangirl
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Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by Sangirl » Tue Nov 26, 2019 11:54 am

Hi,
I have a disease that makes it painful to have vaginal penetration and so I haven't had sexual intercourse or an orgasm. To be honest I don't really have that much of a sex drive at all. But I've heard that you actually can have an orgasm from anal sex and so I got curious. I've tried it on myself and my sex drive has gone up somewhat (now I actually fantasize about sex) but I can't seem to get an orgasm or really get horny by it.

How long does it usually take before you can have an orgasm or enjoy it. How does guys usually respond to girls that only have anal sex, it seems quite taboo.

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analsexonly
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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by analsexonly » Tue Nov 26, 2019 12:43 pm

Hi @Sangirl, welcome to the forum!

Painful vaginal penetration as a result of a variety of different things is a common reason many women start looking to anal sex as an alternative, and it can be an excellent alternative indeed! Anal orgasms are indeed possible, but because everyone's body is different, it can take different amounts of time for different people to figure out how to have them. You can try following some of the tips in our Guide to Anal Orgasm to see if they help you!

How long have you been exploring anal penetration? If you've just started, definitely stick with it and keep trying. Fantasize about scenarios that get you horny and try masturbating anally. If something feels particularly good, keep doing it. Are you able to orgasm from clitoral stimulation? At least when getting started, you can try combining clit play with anal play to start building the associations between an existing source of pleasure for you (if clit play isn't your thing, perhaps nipple play or something else you enjoy?) and anal stimulation will help start to unlock the pleasure and develop the ability to get aroused by and orgasm from anal.

The taboo nature of anal varies significantly between cultures, regions and individual people. Many men love anal and very much like the idea of women who only want to have anal sex. Some like both but are willing to focus on anal. Some haven't considered the idea but when presented with it end up loving it. And some don't want to be anal only or don't want anal at all. It all depends on the person, and just like anything else with dating, you have to put yourself out there and face your fears of revealing yourself to others, and you may not immediately find the right person, but I guarantee there are men out there who would love you for who you are and adore the fact that you can only have anal sex.

Sangirl
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Joined: Tue Nov 26, 2019 11:31 am
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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by Sangirl » Tue Nov 26, 2019 12:57 pm

Hi @@analsexonly
Thanks for your reply.
I have tried anal penetration for a month. It's been slowly
Getting more enjoyable but not near orgasm I think.
No I can't seem to get orgasm at all which is why I'm exploring anal sex.
I'll follow the guide and hope it will help.
Thanks again.

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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by analsexonly » Tue Nov 26, 2019 1:00 pm

A month is a good start, and the fact that it keeps getting more enjoyable is a very good sign. I'd encourage you to keep it up and focus on the parts you find most enjoyable and keep trying to make them even better. As you get more practice and experience, you'll figure out what feels best, and combined with your increasing arousal from anal, you may find yourself getting closer to the edge of an orgasm. If you feel something building inside you as you masturbate anally, keep doing that and it may get you to orgasm eventually. It might even sort of feel like you have to pee at first.

How frequently are you masturbating anally so far on average?

Are you just using fingers, household objects, or do you have any anal toys to use?

Sangirl
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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by Sangirl » Tue Nov 26, 2019 1:17 pm

I'd say about 2 times a week. With only fingers, havent bought any sex toys yet.

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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by analsexonly » Tue Nov 26, 2019 1:24 pm

I'd encourage you to start doing it more often as you feel comfortable increasing the pace. Often if you aren't doing it as frequently, your body can end up somewhat forgetting what it's learning with anal, but if you keep doing it regularly and stay warmed up and in the anal mood, you can develop a sort of anal arousal and mindset that keeps you wanting more and in turn keeps you practicing and getting more pleasure from it.

Butt plugs and dildos can help with that as well as you get more into it—fingering can be great, but toys made for anal are awesome too, and with butt plugs, you get to feel a subtle sensation of pleasure as you wear it even when doing other things, which is a lot of fun.

Sangirl
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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by Sangirl » Fri Nov 29, 2019 2:21 pm

So what kind of dildos and butt plugs are preferable. I see that there are alot of different materials. Which is best?

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Re: Can't have vaginal but curious of anal

Post by analsexonly » Fri Nov 29, 2019 3:42 pm

Silicone is the best material for soft, flexible toys, but it's also generally more expensive. You want to avoid jelly toys, though they seem to be less common these days. There are other assorted materials as well. You can often find some cheaper dildos places like Amazon or in your local sex toy store.

Stainless steel and glass are good for rigid toys. Steel tends to be more expensive and glass can be cheaper. Very cheap glass toys scare some people (though I've never heard of an issue), but moderately priced to high end ones tend to be well tempered and very strong.

Our Guide to Anal Toys has some more details and suggestions on some good brands and options, though tends more towards the the higher end. If you have a local shop, they may have good options as well.

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