analsexonly wrote: ↑
Mon May 21, 2018 4:17 pm
Progress takes time, and is often a journey, and while you've likely just begun on figuring out what will ultimately work for the both of you, I think people's positive and encouraging reactions are because you both are willing to work to get there and that's a really good sign for both of you. In this situation, a lot of people would shut it down cold and it would become a major point of contention or sore subject as a result, but the fact that you're willing to research, experiment, and try to see things from multiple perspectives as well as see whether it's something that you can come around to enjoy and share at the same level as your husband, is a really positive sign.
It is a difficult thing to take yourself outside of a situation and try to see things objectively. I can see now that I have been at times harsh with my husband, indifferent to his feelings and needs, and not as open minded as I used to be. Funny thing how we change without noticing.
I always research everything! Somewhat obsessively at times, something else that my husband complains about as he just wants to get on with things. In this case I'm feeling slightly validated since I have learned a thing or two here, my initial ideas about it came from prejudice, and I can see this 'lifestyle' has worked for others.
I'm also realistic and know it isn't the magic cure all.
From a physical perspective, as you continue to do it with greater frequency, it will continue to get significantly easier, and will keep feeling better.
Attitude can play a big role as well in enjoying it, and it sounds like you're enjoying it more since you've opened up a bit more to the idea. Taking the approach of it being something that you explore together for each other's mutual pleasure, a sexy, intimate adventure, can really make a difference in how you perceive every aspect of it. Sex should be consensual and fun for everyone, and anal only is no different in this regard.
You are correct about anal sex becoming easier, which does in turn help it to be more fun. At this stage it feels very strange to have decided to try this out and I guess I haven't had time to yet process all my feelings, such as putting vaginal sex to one side for the time being. I'm not sure what to think or feel or if I'm too analytical about something which is all about physical love.