I have been toying with myself for a couple of years now as my wife will not try anything other than vanilla. I have diy'ed a few items as well as buying online and have recently experienced the following when trying to achieve a prostate orgasm.
I have crafted my own version of the NJoy Pure Wand and it feels absolutely fantastic, however after a while of arousing my prostate with it, I start getting the opposite of contractions. In essence, I am bearing down, like when you are trying to do a bowel movement. These sensations normally last for a few seconds and then abate before the next one hits me. I can stop it by not stimulating the area. After a few of these anti-contractions ( I dont know what really you could call them??), it is not uncommon to produce some fecal matter. This also happens when I am riding a dong in the shower.
As I have never had anal sex, I am wondering if this sensation is normal or if anyone else has experienced the same? Thanks.
Suggestions to avoid this would be:
- try not to stimulate quite so high inside, and focus only in the prostate which is about 2” inside.
- If you do wish to stimulate that deeply, (like if you’re trying to stimulate the seminal vesicles,) flush with an enema first to clear out feces in the sigmoid. That would be the top recommendation for anyone experiencing feces during play.
- Let that upper sphincter relax and get used to staying open with a long buttplug; the Doc Johnson Mood Naughty 2 XL is a good and comfortable option to do this. When you first insert it, you’ll feel that bearing-down autonomic response—to get the sphincter to open, clench a few times. This signals to the sphincter that it can’t expel right now, and should open to allow the plug up into it. Once you’ve worn the plug for a while and the sphincter is relaxed, play with keeping the toy in that area, rather than thrusting back and forth through the sphincter, which may cause it to contract again.
In time, you should be able to learn how deep your toys need to be and what angle to use to avoid making the muscles contract.
Good luck and have fun
Couple of questions:
1) What is the sphincter at the top of the rectum you are referring to? Are you talking about the external sphincter? I haven't seen any sphincter muscles labeled on any diagrams of the rectum/sigmoid colon area.
2) Wouldn't the expelling nature from what you are saying happen to anybody that inserts anything long up there? Or is it a matter of getting used to having something up there?
Also: funny that you should ask and mention that you haven’t seen a sphincter labeled there on anatomy charts: it is actually a nerdily and hotly contested anatomical feature in the medical world. It shares the ring-like muscle traits and nerve actuation of a true sphincter, but also some of the longer-fiber-muscle traits and autonomic actuation of the entire colon—it is basically a hybrid sphincter unlike any other muscle tissue in the human body. Loads of scholarly articles have been published from both the “it’s-totally-a-sphincter!” And “it’s-technically-not-a-sphincter!” camps. So you’ll see both “junction” and “sphincter” used in its nomenclature.
Recent research has actually suggested, though, that 40% of the population has a true sphincter there, and the other 60% have...well... varying degrees of...a junctiony-valvey-thingy.
Seriously. If you’re nerdy enough to want to watch researchers lose their minds over it: Google “rectosigmoid junction sphincter” and look at the scholarly conflagration. Haha!
2. Your second question absolutely hits the nail on the head and highlights the anatomical difference between people. You’re most likely in the 40% camp I mentioned above, and certainly within the 60-80% camp whose junction is more “sphincter” than it is “valve-like long muscle.”
The answer to the second part of your question, though, is: yes, even if you have that bearing-down tendency of a true sphincter (which causes that 40% of the population to be more prone to colorectal muscle-related constipation) you can ABSOLUTELY train that muscle to consciously relax. And there likely is even some health benefit if you do—namely: avoiding the aforementioned constipation issues later in life by gaining mindfulness and a modicum if control over that [sphincter] muscle.