Trying new things

[shy and horny]

I really want to try some new things, I’m in my first ao relationship and it’s been great. But I want more…..how do I bring this up? What if my bf is not into it?

[Peachy V]

Just go slow. It isn't a race. Think of things you want to try and show interest. If he is open to it he will let you know. As long as you don't jump from anal to ball torture, I am sure you will be fine

[Backdoorlover]

You say you are in your first AO relationship, but you want more. Define “more”.

[AnalEngineer]

Also how can you be in an AO relationship for 2 years, butt not be sure if your boyfriend likes it?

[Peachy V]

Her boyfriend likes anal. She said she is not sure if he would be into other things.

[shy and horny]

Everything is just very routine. I’d like more foreplay or Maybe try out some toys. I don’t feel like we have much of a sex life and I’ve tried to talk to him about it and feel like he gets super uncomfortable. Please don’t get me wrong, I enjoy it but I feel like he is very selfish and I don’t know where to start or what to do so it will change.

[NoVagAnal]

Everything is just very routine. I’d like more foreplay or Maybe try out some toys. I don’t feel like we have much of a sex life and I’ve tried to talk to him about it and feel like he gets super uncomfortable. Please don’t get me wrong, I enjoy it but I feel like he is very selfish and I don’t know where to start or what to do so it will change.

There are one of two things going on here, he is either not as sexual as you are, which would be bad if that was the case. Or he is being shy and embarrassed about trying the new things. Best way to know if something you want to try is something he is into is bring it up or even try it if you can and see how is cock reacts. If it gets rock hard then you know he likes it. If it doesn't get or stay hard then maybe he is not into.

These matters can be complicated and might hing on things from his past. Hopefully you guys have the sexual compatibility you need. So far you guys have already agreed to AO I assume there is at least some of that. You may just have a bigger labido than him.

[shy and horny]

@NoVagAnal I’m not sure, maybe it’s a bit of both. But it’s not like I want sex 3 times a day, once daily would be fantastic or even every other day. Once a week is just not satisfactory for me.

I want to be open and talk to him but I can see how uncomfortable it makes him. I’ve told him we should be able to talk about it. But I guess what can I expect, we never even discussed being AO, it just happened naturally.

[Backdoorlover]

Is the lack of sex caused by your social/work life or is desinterest the cause ? This is the mother of all questions here.

At you age life tends to ask too much, making it hard to sit back and enjoy.

Then onther thing I notice is that you don’t seem that compatible as a couple. Not being able to bring up your issues is difficult.

[NoVagAnal]

@NoVagAnal I’m not sure, maybe it’s a bit of both. But it’s not like I want sex 3 times a day, once daily would be fantastic or even every other day. Once a week is just not satisfactory for me.

I want to be open and talk to him but I can see how uncomfortable it makes him. I’ve told him we should be able to talk about it. But I guess what can I expect, we never even discussed being AO, it just happened naturally.

The fact that he gets uncomfortable with it may indicate that he is experiencing shame. That would be better than him just not being as sexual as you. Wanting anal once a day is totally reasonable, especially for your age. Once a week is way too little even for much older ages. At least for people with our level of libido. There isn't much you can do if he is just not sexual l, but if he is just shy about it you can make progress. I've been with my wife for a decade and we are still making progress on her end. Recently we made a some bigger revelations and things are starting to improve. I hope that turned for us continues. But hopefully this is the case with your man.

All you can do for now is try and very slowly bring him in little by little. If he is feeling shame he will automatically reject anything to defend his mental state. But there will be a part of him that is aroused. And you will need to try and cater to that part. Just remember these things take time and lots of effort. There may even be some last trauma that is getting in the way. If that is the case it may be good to deal with that as well. It's hard to know for sure. But you should try as much as you can to see if he is just hiding from himself, or if this is just who he is.