3 weeks anal only

[Robert]

Try to be comprehensive and not to push her too far too quickly.
That was my piece of advice

Agreed. That's the last thing I want to do as I absolutely want this to work
I was unsure because I couldn't tell from the way she said it if she meant it in the "everyone says you shouldn't have too much anal, therefore i need a break" way, or if she genuinely felt a physical need. You all know how it is - so many people act on what they hear people say.
Why is it that even in the best relationships (and ours is great) communicating about sex is so hard - its a minefield sometimes.

[marcus]

As the other guys have said: You are more likely to get what you want by working on this together. This means you both listen, respect and understand each others needs.

There is no need to rush this. From what you have told us, you are actually doing really well. I perfectly understand the desire to go AO RIGHT NOW, but you need to remember it takes time. It took many years before my own wife could or even wanted to do all anal all of the time. You are already way ahead of the majority, so just ease back slightly, and in time she'll be able to take you comfortably in her anus as often as the two of you would like.

[LuvMyWifesAss]

Robert,

Make sure you are providing lots of positive reinforcement. Tell her how sexy her ass is. Let her know how lucky you feel that you have a girlfriend that allows you to have anal sex with her. Let her know how you've never felt closer to her before than when you are having anal sex with her. Let her know how you can't beleive you get to cum in her ass, etc. Remember, you want her to equate the positive feelings she has, whether physical or mental, to anal sex. But don't make it all about anal. Let her know how beautiful she is, give her back rubs, flowers, etc. at those times when you two have had anal sex..

Reinforcement works both ways as well. If she really wants vaginal sex, don't complain. Act as if you are happy to do it. However, provide her less stimulation, pleasure, and positive reinforcement. What I mean by this is, pay less attention to her breasts or other erogenous zones. Don't provide the feedback you will be during anal sex. If you are pleasuring her breasts and telling her how beautiful and incredible she is during anal sex but not during vaginal sex, she will equate those positive feelings to anal sex. She will feel more loved and accepted when having anal sex. As a result, she will begin to want anal sex more and more. Done well, she won't even realize this is intentional. Better yet, she will begin to want anal sex as much as you do. This isn't wrong or deceptive. Remember, you are taking her to a place of greater pleasure and intimacy. She wants it, she just doesn't know it.

This has made a big impact on others. So this is my advice.

[Robert]

Thanks for the support and advice marcus and luvmywifesass. I'll take on board what you and the others have said. The positive reinforcement makes sense and is something I can work on. To a degree I think i'm already doing that but at a subconcious level, but now that you've brought it up I can really focus on it and apply it correctly. I can be quite vocal during sex so i'm positive she does know how I feel and how much better anal is and how sexy she is.
Just to be sure, I never ever complain about having to have vaginal, though I'm always honest about what my preference is. Is that bad? And so far she hasn't complain once about anal, or the frequency that we have it. On the contrary, we have the most intense sex of our lives. Its her that often asks for anal or guides me to her ass herself. I've heard reports that women can find it addictive after getting used to it in a way they don't about vaginal. And thats how it looks to me now. She definitely wants it more and when doing anal shes more exciting, orgasmic and into sex than she is normally. It is hard to actually put into words but she's like a different person in the bedroom since we started.

[LuvMyWifesAss]

Robert,

It's fine to express your preference for anal,sex, as long as that expression doesn't express that you don't care for vaginal (at least at this point). Remember the positive reinforcement need to extend beyond the bedroom. When you've had anal sex, make sure you give her lots of positive attention. You know, go that extra mile. For example a back rub, doing something with her she enjoys (shopping, etc.), or taking her out for a special night.

From your description, I think you have a good start toward an anal only lifestyle. It's the articulation and agreement to such that can be difficult for her. When my wife finally told me she didn't want to have vaginal sex anymore, we both realized that was our desire years earlier, but we were both concerned the other would be disappointed. Now we regret not articulating to one another earlier. When you think she might be open to it, you can say something like, "Vaginal sex with you is great, but anal is really mind blowing. I wouldn't even if we only had anal sex." This would give you the opportunity to gauge her response and possibly lead to further discussion. I would do this after an anal sex session she particularly enjoyed.

Good luck!

[marcus]

That's sound advice from luvmywifesass.

If I may I'll add my own observation. We men can be a little single-minded and perhaps veer towards the selfish when it comes to sex. I'm not trying to be insulting to my fellow males, but it is close to the truth, even when we try to be otherwise. Of course we take pleasure in our partners satisfaction, but it is in our natures to have this compelling sex drive. Women are different. They are more mentally aroused, but also more driven by what it is that you do together. Sex is more mutual. Not that there cannot be any overlap between the sexes, but with women the approach sex is more holistic, and probably a more complex blend of feelings and emotions, both physical and mental.

Basically, if she feels you are pulling your weight in the relationship, sexual or otherwise, and feels her efforts are reciprocated then she in return will do more to make you happy. Seeing the pleasure and happiness you get from anal will encourage her to provide more of it.

[analonlylondonebony]

That was where I didn't want to be.

It depends on if you love her. But consider, supposing she puts an absolute embargo on anal sex? A lot of people still see it as odd and weird to be the only thing done.

A report on where we are now:

Some of you were right and my girlfriend did ask for vaginal sex, which we have had now just a couple of times in the last month.
She said "I do have another hole you know". I'll admit, its a let down to hear those words but what can you do?? On the positive side, the sex was brief and what I'd describe as functional and nothing like the really hot sex we had been having. I'm sure she was as unsatisfied as I was but I can't say 100% as all I know is that my heart wasn't in it. I know it can sometimes be that way at the best of times but something sure felt different (ignoring the hole I was in).

She'd also been talking about her ass needing a rest now and again, but honestly she'd been fine up until that point. What is the concensus? Is it better to press on in the early days of AO, or to take some breaks for the best results? Or does it vary for individuals? She's never complained of being sore after so part of me thinks this may be some idea she has.

My limited trial of AO has so far convinced me even more that its what I need for myself in the future. It was fucking awesome!

[Robert]

That was where I didn't want to be.
It depends on if you love her. But consider, supposing she puts an absolute embargo on anal sex? A lot of people still see it as odd and weird to be the only thing done.

I don't think she'll put an embargo on anal sex as I think she likes it too much. I'm very much hoping I can convince her in the long run to go AO. And why is it people don't think its odd or weird for vaginal to be the only thing done. Its sex, so its about pleasure and two people should keep on doing the thing that gives them the most pleasure. In our case thats anal.