Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Tell about your own experiences with the anal only lifestyle.
nopussy
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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by nopussy » Mon Apr 06, 2015 5:34 am

Canassman wrote:1) These things made me wonder about ways to contribute to "normalizing" the idea of anal. Do others have any ideas of ways we can contribute to this?

I think the main thing you can do is simply challenge negative assumptions whenever they're made. For instance, a lot of people see anal sex as being only something that gay men would want, or as being necessarily dirty, or as always involving pain for the recipient. It's important to challenge assumptions like these.

It's also important to educate people about the proper ways to do anal. It requires more time and preparation than vaginal sex. A lot of women hate it because their partners didn't bother putting in the work to make it pleasurable for them. That's a big part of why many people assume it will be painful or damaging.
Canassman wrote:2) has anyone ever "come out" as enjoying anal? Or as an AO couple! To friends? Family? If so, how did it go? Did anyone express their interest? Disgust? Anyone change an opinion? Ideas of how to do this?

I don't really see it as a matter of "coming out" - if anal sex comes up in conversation (which happens very rarely), I might mention that I do it and love it. I know that at least a couple of my friends are aware that I love it. I doubt I'd ever talk about it with my family (in general, I don't particularly want to talk about sex with family relatives).

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by LuvMyWifesAss » Sat Apr 11, 2015 7:27 am

Canassman wrote:1) These things made me wonder about ways to contribute to "normalizing" the idea of anal. Do others have any ideas of ways we can contribute to this?

The idea that vaginal sex is any more "normal" than anal sex should be challenged. Here are some excerpts from my site that talk, not just about the benefits of anal sex, but the advantages of anal sex over vaginal sex.

I am of the belief that the benefits of anal sex make it better than vaginal sex for pure pleasure and intimacy.

1. Anal sex provides better orgasms for both partners. There's little denying the tightness of the anus provides more stimulation for the penis, providing more intense orgasms for the male. Most females I've talked to that say they enjoy anal sex (in other words, they gave it a chance and didn't have a guy who just jammed it in there) say they have more intense orgasms during anal sex then vaginal. There are many women who even prefer anal sex to vaginal for this reason.

2. Anal sex is more intimate. Let's face it, there really needs trust and intimacy in a relationship for anal sex. My wife and I reached a new level of intimacy when we started having anal sex. It was something that we alone shared, and our "dirty little secret". Unlike vaginal sex which is also practiced for procreation, anal sex is only practiced for the pleasure of the participants. That, in and of itself, builds trust and intimacy. Both partners can concentrate fully on the pleasure (both received and given) during the act of anal sex.

3. Anal sex is a great form of natural birth control. Yes, I've read the study that states anal sex has an 8% failure rate as a form of birth control. The same study stated condoms had an 11% failure rate. The study took into account those who said their primary form of birth control was anal sex, but then had vaginal sex. Therefore, anal sex would have a much lower failure rate if properly practiced. As well, the study says pregnancy may result from "seepage". Common sense would dictate that you not allow that to happen. As well, semen that is deposited deep in the rectum should be beyond the rectal valves. Unless the woman is on top of the man when he withdraws his penis, the semen should stay in the anus. As well, women must remember to wipe front to back for sanitary reasons, as well as birth control.

4. Anal sex may provide health benefits for the female recipient. Several studies have suggested the positive health effects of semen on women, such as feeling happier and more content. These studies were, one would assume, based on those having vaginal intercourse. As the rectal lining is thinner then that of the vagina, it is better able to absorb those bodies the produce the positive effects, making anal sex the superior method for delivering these benefits.

As far as the, "It's an exit" argument, what is there about the design of the anus and rectum that makes one assume this? To the contrary, if you look at the below illustration, which is shaped more like a penis, the vagina or the rectum? Which one is open ended and looks like it could accommodate a larger penis? The vagina is closed ended. It can be uncomfortable or even painful for a woman if a man hits the back wall of her vagina during intercourse. If a man ejaculates while the head of his penis is against the wall of the vagina, it can be difficult to ejaculate fully. He may even experience a retrograde ejaculation, where semen is forced into the urinary tract. As the rectum is open ended, the man can penetrate the woman fully and experience complete ejaculation. As well, as the rectum is tighter, the woman can feel each surge of the man as he ejaculates.


Image

I always love the argument you can't have anal sex all the time, or you'll get bored with it. Really? Why is it no one says this about vaginal sex? To the contrary, the rectum is better suited for regular sexual activity. The larger, stronger muscles of the sphincter and the rectal valves not only have the ability to better stimulate a man's penis to ejaculation, but remain tighter with regular use. As well, once the vagina serves is purpose, that of delivering a baby, it will never be as tight as it once was, let alone as tight as the rectum. This is the primary reason many couples begin having anal sex after having children.

Of course, there's the argument that the vagina is self lubricating and the anus is not. As vaginal sex is necessary for the survival of our species, this is a mechanism to allow vaginal sex virtually any time, under any conditions. This allowed the human race, living in a cave somewhere, to procreate. Anal sex, on the other hand, only has one purpose, that of pleasure. If a person is in a position of enjoying sex, they can probably find a lubricant. I read someplace that the Greeks used their best olive oil for anal sex. Also, to say the rectum is without lubrication is not exactly true. While the anus has no mechanism for lubrication, the rectum itself is lined with a mucus that is very slippery.

One of the practical aspects of anal sex is one important to my wife - leakage. When we used to have vaginal sex, my cum would leak out of her vagina for the rest of the day. She hated this feeling and always had to wear a panty liner after vaginal sex. The secret is ejaculating beyond her rectal valves. During anal sex, I ejaculate beyond her rectal valves. Her valves then close as my penis is withdrawn, and my cum stays put. We can then go out to dinner and a movie, and she doesn't experience any negative side effects. To the contrary, her colon is better able to absorb the beneficial chemicals in my ejaculate. Then, when she has her next bowel movement, whats left comes out.
Canassman wrote:2) has anyone ever "come out" as enjoying anal? Or as an AO couple! To friends? Family? If so, how did it go? Did anyone express their interest? Disgust? Anyone change an opinion? Ideas of how to do this?

My wife's cousin is much younger than we are. He used to stay at our house on a regular basis. One time, my wife had left a butt plug in the shower after cleaning off. We didn't realize it until after he used the shower. There was no missing it. He didn't say anything, and neither did we.

Later, he got his girlfriend pregnant. I told him that wouldn't have happened if they had been having anal sex. A couple of years later, I was having a couple of beers with him and he told me his new girlfriend couldn't take birth control and neither one of them could stand condoms, so they took my advice and were having anal sex. I laughed and said that only worked if they only had anal sex. He just said I know, and we left it at that. We've never talked about it again.

They have been married several years now and I know for a fact she still isn't on birth control. When I went to their house to help him with his computer, it was in the bedroom. Right there, next to the bed was a large bottle of silicone lube. So, I'm pretty sure they are anal only. I just can't seem to bring myself to talk to him about it.

It really makes me wonder if there aren't a lot more of us out there than people realize.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by Canassman » Sat Apr 11, 2015 10:31 am

Awesome summarizing of the benefits - thanks very much!

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by mardobolo » Tue Apr 14, 2015 10:30 pm

Outstanding summary! I agree that anal is better in every way, with the sole exception of procreation. Once the children are done there is really no reason to go back.

I think you make an excellent point that I haven't seen made elsewhere, about the rectum being open-ended and all of the benefits that provides. I am fairly large compared to the depth of my wife's vagina, and at full penetration I easily thrust into her cervix and cause her pain. With anal we both love the sensation of me thrusting to full depth without hitting bottom. Ejaculating at full depth into her open rectum is much more satisfying than ejaculating pressed against the back wall of her vagina. The ejaculate flows out much more smoothly and pleasurably when there is a deep space beyond the penis tip to ejaculate into.

I agree we should consider anal to be a perfectly natural thing, and not start with an idea that it's "unnatural". We humans have been doing anal for all of recorded history, over thousands of years. It's reasonable to suppose we were doing it in Neolithic times. Given the placement of the rectum relative to the vagina, and the fact that its size and depth accommodate the penis so readily and pleasurably, it's very possible that humans explicitly evolved a capacity for anal sex. By analogy the large fatty breasts on human women are thought to have evolved because of their attraction to men, rather than for some other biological function (fatty breasts are not necessary to produce milk). Likewise, a sexually attractive and pleasurable anus may have been a trait that early men would have used to select a mate. Acting over thousands of years, that selection pressure has resulted in women developing an anus and rectum that are extremely pleasurable from a male perspective.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by LuvMyWifesAss » Wed Apr 15, 2015 6:27 am

mardobolo wrote:Outstanding summary! I agree that anal is better in every way, with the sole exception of procreation.



Thank you. I have an obsession for learning about anal sex. This comes from 24 years of learning and personal experience.
mardobolo wrote:I think you make an excellent point that I haven't seen made elsewhere, about the rectum being open-ended and all of the benefits that provides. I am fairly large compared to the depth of my wife's vagina, and at full penetration I easily thrust into her cervix and cause her pain. With anal we both love the sensation of me thrusting to full depth without hitting bottom. Ejaculating at full depth into her open rectum is much more satisfying than ejaculating pressed against the back wall of her vagina. The ejaculate flows out much more smoothly and pleasurably when there is a deep space beyond the penis tip to ejaculate into.

My wife and I have the same experience. If I thrust forcefully into her vagina, I would hit her cervix, causing her pain. When I came, it always felt like something was impeding my ejaculate, like wearing a condom without leaving space at the end for ejaculate. It's almost as if it often felt like I wasn't having a complete orgasm. With anal, we both naturally strain at orgasm to get me as deep as possible into her ass to cum. There, my orgasm is much stronger and delivers a greater volume of semen. I feel like I have a complete orgasm every time. This is all not even to mention the fact her anus, rectum, and rectal valves can stimulate my cock in ways a vagina couldn't come close to. Sometimes it feels like her ass is almost sucking the cum out of me. If, as several studies have suggested, semen provides benefits for the female, this greater volume of semen and better absorption of the colon (compared to the vagina) would maximize those benefits.
mardobolo wrote:I agree we should consider anal to be a perfectly natural thing, and not start with an idea that it's "unnatural". We humans have been doing anal for all of recorded history, over thousands of years... Given the placement of the rectum relative to the vagina, and the fact that its size and depth accommodate the penis so readily and pleasurably, it's very possible that humans explicitly evolved a capacity for anal sex... Likewise, a sexually attractive and pleasurable anus may have been a trait that early men would have used to select a mate. Acting over thousands of years, that selection pressure has resulted in women developing an anus and rectum that are extremely pleasurable from a male perspective.

I've made this exact point before. Nature accentuates those traits that attract a mate. Do humans have more sex for the purpose of procreation, or pleasure? Pleasure, of course. It only makes sense that, in the human female, nature would accentuate her ass more than her vagina.

Given these benefits, it's unfortunate society has conditioned us that anal sex is wrong, or that anal sex is a "once in a while" thing. It would be far better if, like the ancient Greeks, we were conditioned to believe anal sex was natural, and the preferred form of sexual activity. Then, couples would begin with anal sex and only have vaginal sex when they desired procreation.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by Robert » Wed Apr 15, 2015 7:40 am

LuvMyWifesAss wrote:It would be far better if, like the ancient Greeks, we were conditioned to believe anal sex was natural, and the preferred form of sexual activity. Then, couples would begin with anal sex and only have vaginal sex when they desired procreation.

What a wonderful world that would be! :D

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by mardobolo » Thu Apr 16, 2015 12:42 am

LuvMyWifesAss wrote:It would be far better if, like the ancient Greeks, we were conditioned to believe anal sex was natural, and the preferred form of sexual activity. Then, couples would begin with anal sex and only have vaginal sex when they desired procreation.

I think we'll get there eventually. We've talked a lot in this forum about the rapidly growing awareness and acceptance of anal sex. Oral sex went down the path of acceptance over the last 30-40 years. I would bet more guys now have their first orgasm with a woman from oral sex, not from vaginal.

The beauty of anal as a first exposure to sex is that it doesn't have the risks of vaginal (risks of pregnancy and STIs). But unlike oral, which is a passive act on the part of the man, anal is a more natural copulatory act. So it comes naturally to both men and women and is a better introduction to sex in general.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by yosemite » Thu Apr 16, 2015 5:42 pm

Well, the risk of pregnancy is pretty low with anal...but you're saying that there's no risk of STIs?

If that were true, my best friend would still be alive.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by LuvMyWifesAss » Thu Apr 16, 2015 6:40 pm

mardobolo wrote:...Oral sex went down the path of acceptance over the last 30-40 years. I would bet more guys now have their first orgasm with a woman from oral sex, not from vaginal.

The beauty of anal as a first exposure to sex is that it doesn't have the risks of vaginal (risks of pregnancy and STIs). But unlike oral, which is a passive act on the part of the man, anal is a more natural copulatory act. So it comes naturally to both men and women and is a better introduction to sex in general.

Great points, Mardobolo. I know the first load I ever blew with my wife (then girlfriend) was receiving oral sex. As a matter of fact, we had lots of oral sex before ever having vaginal sex because she wasn't on the pill and was afraid of pregnancy. Unfortunatly, it's not as though she received the same kind of enjoyment out of it. It's a shame society's hang-ups with anal sex caused us not even to think of having anal sex.

Considering how much we both enjoyed anal sex the first time we tried it, I believe, had we had anal sex from the start, that we would have continued to practice anal sex, even after trying vaginal sex. We've actually talked about the fact that we didn't know what we were missing and that, had we started out having anal sex, we probably would have tried vaginal a couple of times and returned to anal.

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Re: Normalizing Anal? "Coming out" as anal lovers?

Post by mardobolo » Fri Apr 17, 2015 1:54 am

yosemite wrote:Well, the risk of pregnancy is pretty low with anal...but you're saying that there's no risk of STIs?

If that were true, my best friend would still be alive.

I'm sorry to hear about your friend.

I made a typo! Thanks for pointing it out. I meant to say urinary tract infections (UTIs), not STIs. It's definitely known that many STIs, including most of the serious ones like HIV, will transmit through anal sex. People need to know this and take precautions if they need to.

Regarding UTIs, they affected my wife and I quite a bit when we did mostly vaginal sex. She would get them from time to time regardless of the precautions we took. After we switched to mostly anal sex, UTIs have so far completely gone away. For us this has been one of the many benefits of anal.

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