Anal Only Lifestyle Forum

I was just thinking about all the things people say about anal sex not being "normal." What if anal sex were "normal" and vaginal sex was relegated to procreation? What kind of things would people say to those who had vaginal sex anyway?

Imagine if people were to say, "Ew, vaginal sex? Why would you want to do that, unless you're trying to get pregnant?"

Or, "It's not natural to have vaginal sex, unless you're trying to get pregnant."

Or, "Come on, Baby, let's try vaginal sex." "No way! That's gross. You only do that if you want to get pregnant. Besides, What if my someone were to find out?"

Or (to those who have vaginal sex all the time), "You can't have vaginal sex all the time. Her vagina will get all loose and sloppy and leak all over."

How about, "You put it in her vagina? Did you get fish stink on your dick? That's nasty man."

What can you come up with?

"Dude you'd better hope she gets knocked up soon so you can get that over with."

"Honey can we just use the clinic to get pregnant? That's what Clarisse and Dave did. You masturbate into a cup and the doctor uses a syringe to put it inside me. If we try to have sex that way it's just going to feel weird and it won't be very romantic."

"Look at these sexy panties I picked up for date night tonight! They're assless panties, see how there's an open panel in back where my hole is? When we get home you can lift my skirt and fuck my ass without even taking my panties off."

"Ewww, that's where babies come from!"

What kind of pleasure do you get from a hole that is big enough to squirt out a big ass baby? It's like throwing a hotdog down a hallway!

johnywest wrote:"Ewww, that's where babies come from!"

Great one!

How about, "It was nasty. When he came in there, it leaked out for hours, not like when he cums in my ass."

"Doesn't vaginal hurt?"
"Ass is for making love, pussy is for making babies."
"He fingered and ate me out. It was OK until he tried to slip a finger in my pussy. That guy is a total pig."

Something that can never be said:

"No you can't fuck my ass. It's 'that time of the month'."

omgnacolestfu wrote:"He fingered and ate me out. It was OK until he tried to slip a finger in my pussy. That guy is a total pig."

Something that can never be said:

"No you can't fuck my ass. It's 'that time of the month'."

Great ones!

omgnacolestfu wrote: "Ass is for making love, pussy is for making babies."

That is so true. One day the rest of the world will catch up.

What do you mean you got pregnant "by accident"?? You just accidently ended up with his dick in the wrong hole?

"World overpopulation was solved and Planned Parenthood shut down all of their offices... all they had to do was post a sign on the door with an arrow pointing to the proper hole for sex!"

"I don't get it... why does he want to fuck my pussy? Isn't my ass good enough for him?!"

"I can't believe it, did you hear that Tammy Jo is pregnant again? What, are they too poor to afford Astroglide?"

"Why does he want to stick it in my birth canal and jab it up at my womb? It sounds like he's got serious Mommy issues."

"Vaginal Sex is a conspiracy by the condom industry!"

singleinDC wrote:"I can't believe it, did you hear that Tammy Jo is pregnant again? What, are they too poor to afford Astroglide?"

These are all great, but I love this one! I think it's the best one yet.