Newbie....help please....thoughts?

777joee · Post by **777joee** » Thu Aug 04, 2016 3:21 pm

Hi all. New to this site. Married many years. Wish there was more anal in my life and looking for tips on how to get my wife more into it. I love her vagina and mouth but her butt and star are my favorite thing on the planet. I just love licking her with my nose buried as deep as I can in here tight little anus but it usually has to be pretty drunk out to have anal happen.

analgirl98 · Post by **analgirl98** » Thu Aug 04, 2016 3:57 pm

When you're having anal sex is it only ever with drink involved? Do you ever do it sober? Does she actually enjoy it?

Post by **analsexonly** » Sat Aug 06, 2016 12:39 pm

Does she enjoy other anal activities, like rimming and smaller anal penetration with toys or fingers during other stimulation like cunnilingus or vaginal sex? If so, focus on what she does enjoy, figure out how to make it incredibly pleasurable for her, and incorporate it regularly in sex. Maximize her pleasure surrounding anal stimulation and try to work from there with her to see if she'll open up to trying more. If she remains hesitant to go any further, talk openly with her about why. Get to the root of the reason she doesn't want to engage in anal intercourse and see if there's a way you can work together towards her becoming more comfortable with it. Pain or fear of pain is common for many people, and it's a valid concern even if it can be completely mitigated, because most people who try anal sex for the first time or several times without having prepared for it more properly. And even if it's something that's been done over a long period of time, if the correct warmup procedures, etc. aren't practiced and it isn't done frequently enough to learn to relax and open up, it can be unenjoyable every time. But that doesn't have to be the case.

Ultimately, as with most things, you'd probably be best off communicating. Talk it over with her. Express how much you love and enjoy doing it with her, and ask why she dislikes it, and if there's anything you could do to to make her more amenable to it.

777joee · Post by **777joee** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 3:11 pm

analgirl98 wrote:When you're having anal sex is it only ever with drink involved? Do you ever do it sober? Does she actually enjoy it?

No on the odd occasion it happens she is not always drunk. When she has been able to fully relax we both enjoyed it. She has a "its dirty" thought always. Ok maybe but I don't care. I respect her wishes but I really love her butt. Pun intended

777joee · Post by **777joee** » Tue Aug 09, 2016 3:23 pm

Thanks all....I'm working on her slowly.......I'll give her plenty of time.

analgirl98 · Post by **analgirl98** » Tue Aug 16, 2016 12:45 am

The problem you may have here Joe is that she she's anal sex as dirty. That's a thought process you may never get her out of, however, there is always hope

.

I was always told that anal sex was wrong, unnatural, dirty, filthy, disgusting, something only gays, hookers and porn stars did and that it always hurt and wasn't pleasurable at all.

My mum sat me down when I was about 11 and had "the talk" about sex and stuff because of something that had come on telly, I asked a question, she was very open and honest but told me anal was wrong because it's "an exit only" orifice lol.

Luckily, she wasn't the only one to have that talk with me that day and I got a very different account of Anal sex the second time.

Im not ashamed to tell everyone that I'd been playing with myself since I was about 11 and after the 2nd conversation I was intrigued enough to add anal play to my self-love experiences. About 6-8 months later I was involved in a sexual relationship and was asked if I would like to try it. Couldn't at first, but over the course of a few months we worked up to it and the rest is history.

The thing is, I've always been meticulously clean. I shower twice a day, more if I've had sex, and always smell good, so was the guy I was with then, he was very good at what he was doing and we never saw even a hint of anything unpleasant. So from very early on I learnt it wasn't dirty at all.

Just be patient, take it at her pace but try adding a bit of rimming to your oral routine and gently rub and penetrate her bum with a single finger every time you go down on her, make the light anal play a standard part of foreplay and she'll soon realise it's not just amazing but also very clean.