Newbies still to make the AO change

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nightowl
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Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by nightowl » Mon Jan 08, 2018 1:55 pm

Hi there, we are a UK couple who have been talking about going either anal only or at least making it our main intercourse method, but despite agreeing anal makes more sense for us we still need that moment that makes us switch. Old habits die hard maybe.

So far for us it has mainly been talking and agreeing rather actually doing, so any encouragement or ideas will be much appreciated!

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analsexonly
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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by analsexonly » Mon Jan 08, 2018 2:38 pm

Welcome to the forum!

If you've talked about it, presumably you both already enjoy anal sex. How often are you having anal at present, and how much does that compare to vaginal for the two of you? Are you both on board with the idea of going anal only or does one of you favor/prefer it more? Have you tried any period of being anal only yet, or has it been entirely theoretical thus far?

nightowl
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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by nightowl » Tue Jan 09, 2018 11:38 am

Thanks for the welcome.

We have anal typically every month which coincides with Natalie's fertile phase so effectively AO for short periods but tend to revert back to vaginal for the last 10 days or so of her cycle out of habit. These days though, we are using increasing amounts of lube for vaginal to the point the big advantage of it is now gone :lol:

We aren't planning on children any more so we have casually talked about going AO and agreed it made sense, but still stuck in our old routine a bit.

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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by Sgt_Valk » Tue Jan 09, 2018 4:19 pm

Sounds like it's time to just start doing it actively. It really isn't that hard, just any time you guys are going to have sex, do anal instead.
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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by analsexonly » Wed Jan 10, 2018 5:42 am

Just work to reduce those short periods you have vaginal and make them less and less frequent until the final jump to AO is simple and then don't look back.

nightowl
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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by nightowl » Wed Jan 10, 2018 1:47 pm

I think the big hurdle is uninstalling Nat's cycle tracking app so that the period we have anal as the only option widens and the period that vaginal is 'safe' becomes narrower. Funny to think our sex life is governed by such a thing!

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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by analsexonly » Wed Jan 10, 2018 2:14 pm

If that will help, then do so, but it's not that difficult if you both really want it. Just decide "okay, we're going anal only now" and stop having vaginal sex. If you slip up and have vaginal again at some point, just jump back into it with anal either when you realize it or the next time you have sex. The more you start doing anal every time, the easier that habit will be to maintain and the less any interest in vaginal will remain. Right now it seems that you still just consider vaginal an option to return to despite both expressing interest in going anal only, and you'll have to change your mindset and fully adopt the anal only lifestyle together.

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Re: Newbies still to make the AO change

Post by VioletSub » Wed Jan 31, 2018 7:05 am

Hello hello!! I'm in a slightly similar situation. My boyfriend/Sir and I both prefer anal but he doesn't want to go completely AO, which is fine. He does want anal everyday though and that works for me! :lol:

As far as you and your lady, instead of focusing on going from vaginal and anal only for those ten days find ways to incorporate anal pleasure as often as possible. So I mean every time you have sex and also as part of any type of loving touch outside of the bedroom. For example say you two are in the kitchen and you come up to give her a hug and feel her up a bit, caress that sweet spot on her ass and maybe even run your hand along the cleft over her asshole. You may already do these things but if you don't hopefully it can help you two achieve what you really want.

There are other types of things you can do to make you maintain focus on her ass. You can try using plugs during sex or even just as play on it's own. Perhaps start anal training, use something small in her ass as part of foreplay and work your way up to larger and larger toys. Also teasing and touching work wonders! Maybe start to work your way to her ass and just lightly stroke the outside of her asshole. Not necessarily as a way to start having sex, but when you're just cuddling and relaxing and just touching each other. It feels amazing and it will make her want you to just go in her ass, ideally. .

I guess my main point is instead of AO for just a few days, or seeing it as all or nothing, have some anal play every time. Even if you end up having vaginal you are still always incorporating anal. Eventually, anal play will be a part of the way you make love and I think it will make the transition to AO more gradual and more satisfying. This way it isn't something you two discuss beforehand everytime, instead it will become part of what you do every time and before you know it, you guys will be AO because you really don't want it any other way.

Best of luck and keep us posted on your progress!!

Welcome to the AO fam!
xo - violet

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