A beginner

New to the forum? Introduce yourself to the other members of the community. Share a little bit about yourself and your anal only experience and motivations.
theanon1212
Posts: 36
Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:40 am

A beginner

Post by theanon1212 » Sat Feb 28, 2015 7:05 am

Hello forum.

Don't know what to say. Female in my 20's with long-term boyfriend. Long story short: At his request I've agreed to try anal only as this is something he really wants and I'm willing to give it a try.
Looking for shared experiences, understanding and advice.

amorous945
Posts: 151
Joined: Tue Dec 24, 2013 8:56 pm
Gender: Male

Re: A beginner

Post by amorous945 » Sat Feb 28, 2015 8:27 am

Hello, theanon1212, and welcome to the forum! You've come to the right place for advice and support on this particular journey. I "assume" that you and your boyfriend have already been experimenting with anal to some extent, so what led your boyfriend to want an AO relationship? My wife and I didn't consciously choose or decide to go anal only, but it just evolved that way for us over a period of many years. I think the main reason that we started having mostly anal sex was because after the birth of our last child, my wife didn't want to get back on the pill, we both hate condoms and other barriers, and neither one of us wanted to have an operation, so anal was the most natural choice for us. Although there are strong feelings to the contrary amongst non-anal enthusiasts, most of us here believe and have found that anal sex is not only an almost perfect form of birth control, but when performed properly can also be equally enjoyed by both partners, equal to or in many cases more so than vaginal sex.

I'm not sure that my experience mirrors yours in any way, but I'll be happy to help in any way that I can. :D

Robert
Posts: 241
Joined: Tue Mar 11, 2014 5:17 am

Re: A beginner

Post by Robert » Sat Feb 28, 2015 10:57 am

Welcome to the forum theanon1212. Your boyfriend is a very lucky man to have you willing to try anal only. Don't be afraid to ask any questions you may have. I hope it works for you and your boyfriend - if you give it a chance I think you'll like it very much.

luv2play45
Posts: 92
Joined: Mon Nov 17, 2014 11:33 am

Re: A beginner

Post by luv2play45 » Sun Mar 01, 2015 3:18 pm

We're here to help and we would love to hear all the details of how it is working out for you.
The wife & I have been AO for over 20 years now and obviously we both love it.
It's the best thing that ever happened to our sex life.
Take your time, slow down and enjoy the sensations.

marcus
Moderator
Posts: 411
Joined: Sat Oct 12, 2013 3:32 pm
Location: UK

Re: A beginner

Post by marcus » Mon Mar 02, 2015 4:21 am

Welcome theanon1212.

As the others have said, please don't hesitate to ask any questions you may have. Above all communicate with your boyfriend. You should both be able to discuss openly and honestly with one another how you feel about your progress, and what you do or do not like.

theanon1212
Posts: 36
Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:40 am

Re: A beginner

Post by theanon1212 » Mon Mar 02, 2015 7:05 am

Thank you all for making me feel welcome.

amorous945 my boyfriend only told me towards the end of last year that he wanted to have an anal only relationship with me, but I had noticed something was up for months before that. He'd been asking to have anal sex with me more and more to the point I almost always new what he wanted. I was the one to add it to our sex life early to mix it up and I could tell that he liked it, though I didn't know it was such a strong preference until he showed me a blog about anal only. This had been on his mind all the time, he said. It all came out at once, telling me he only liked anal sex; didn't like vaginal; how many couples were doing this; that it was totally normal. I felt mixed up for a while, because although as I said I sensed something was up I didn't necessarily think it must be the sex as we had what I thought was good sex together. I got a little down as I started to have doubts about my body, insecurity and worried that this was some excuse or impossible demand. I don't know what.
A week or two passed. I read the blog and thought it over. I had always enjoyed anal sex with him it's true. I'm slightly sub and do get off on that side of sex. Not that we do anything that involves pain or roleplay or anything like that. But an element of surrender can be exciting to me. After reading around the subject and what other people said I did start to look at it from his perspective and didn't want him to feel unhappy in the relationship. He's a special guy and I wouldn't want to lose him. Therefor I agreed on a trial basis to see how we get along, or if this is just a fantasy of his that burns out.

Up to this point:

I'm not missing the vaginal sex as I thought I would. Time will tell I guess. I do have super O's (always have) from anal which must help.
He has a higher sex drive than me so we have more anal of course than I'm used to and feel a little soreness after. I'm told this needn't be or that it's something that will pass. What kind I expect with regular anal intercourse over the coming weeks (or months if I decide we should continue)?

taylork
Posts: 211
Joined: Sat Oct 12, 2013 12:52 pm

Re: A beginner

Post by taylork » Thu Mar 05, 2015 6:15 pm

Welcome theanon1212.

My girlfriend was just the same at first but i promise you if you keep having enough anal regularly then any soreness will go away. Just don't take any long breaks like a week as it'll just make it harder.

I think you boyfriend is totally normal. I am just the same and my girl has accepted that an even gone anal only with me. There are lots of us out there and its great there are understanding girls like yourself who dont dismiss it or tell us it is wrong or weird when its just natural. If he's the same he'll be much happier when he ceases vaginal sex and you commit to anal only.

I wish you both the best of happiness and hope you see it through with him. If your not missing vaginal so much already then i think your doing great.

LuvMyWifesAss
Moderator
Posts: 332
Joined: Mon Oct 14, 2013 9:05 pm
Gender: Male
Location: Las Vegas, NV
Contact:

Re: A beginner

Post by LuvMyWifesAss » Fri Mar 06, 2015 8:17 am

I'm glad you joined and commented. Your message points out one of the most common issues with couples starting to have anal sex. It's one of the things that concern many women they may be doing some sort of damage to their bodies. Rest assured, this is not the case. My wife and I have been having anal sex about three to five times a week for nearly 24 years, and she has suffered no ill effects.

It's just like starting to exercise, you get a little sore at first. If you continue to exercise three or more times a week, the soreness will go away and not come back. If, however, you were to exercise only once a week, you would continue to experience that soreness. If you have anal sex three times a week or more, I guarantee the soreness will go away in two weeks to a month (at the most).

You have given your boyfriend an incredible gift, one in which you benefit as well. Continue the course, and I promise, you won't regret it.

Good luck!

theanon1212
Posts: 36
Joined: Sat Feb 28, 2015 6:40 am

Re: A beginner

Post by theanon1212 » Fri Mar 06, 2015 6:22 pm

He and I aren't strangers to anal. We haven't just started, but not long ago stopped the vaginal sex. I was starting to think perhaps we should reduce the frequency so that I had more time to recover. I know he won't like it so much but I've read many places that the anus wasn't meant to be used this way all of the time. But then I've found out about people who do have anal all the time and you guys say its ok, so I'm not sure what to think.

All I know is that if it wasn't for the little bit of discomfort I could possibly see us keeping at this. I mean from a selfish point of view, now he's getting more of what he wants he's spending more time on the things I like and trying hard to please me. And it feels more of a 'making love' experience than any time since I can remember with him.

yosemite
Posts: 15
Joined: Wed Mar 11, 2015 6:27 pm

Re: A beginner

Post by yosemite » Thu Mar 19, 2015 6:16 pm

Hi, theanon,

If I might ask, what are you using for lube? DW and I really like refined shea butter or thick silicone lube. Thicker lube of a long-lasting kind is definitely better in the back. You can't bash away as hard, which makes the whole experience last longer and is far gentler on the delicate rosebud.

Cheers

YS

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