Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

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daftdrafter
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2015 5:52 pm

Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

Post by daftdrafter » Thu Sep 03, 2015 6:07 pm

Stumbled across this site as I was researching more and more about other people's perspectives of this aspect of sexuality. I have always been a keen anal lover and have been fortunate enough to have many partners. Some have been very into anal, others ambivalent and some absolutely not (they never lasted too long for me).

My wife and I have known each other since we were 13 (we dated briefly) but got together seriously at 30 so have both had plenty of experiences. We have been married for nearly 6 years and have 1 child who is now 4. We have always enjoyed anal (my wife always claims to prefer vaginal but we'll come to that) as part of our sex life but since our daughter was born my wife has decided (a decision I support) not to go back on the pill. My history with condoms is fairly "meh!" so we have been anal only by accident for 4 years.

My wife is, seemingly, the more reluctant of the 2 of us but she actually can't get enough and most certainly orgasms strongest from anal (and sometimes more than once....that is a hang-up of hers). Since we introduced increasingly stronger vibrating toys into our life she is very into it once started.

Sadly for us our sex life is limited by our options with our little girl who has co-slept with us for 4 years (we live in Asia where this is very normal). This has led to sneaking off into another room for our sex life taking almost all the spontaneity out of it (we are now working on getting her into her own room at night). Nonetheless once we are alone she is fairly quick to get on all fours, place her wand between her legs and let me start playing. She is in love with our Doc Johnson pony tail buttplug right now (and so am I) which gets used alternatively with our Buttman glass bishop butt plug (oh wow!!) and I do get VERY hard (and quite jealous) when we finally slip that in and she starts to moan away. Once we are underway she is filthy and loves to hear about how much I love to see her ass spread open for me (which really wouldn't go down well as an opening gambit for our sessions).

Once in a while (normally when she is stressed and picking holes in me) she tells me that she is annoyed with only having anal but give it a short while and she's ass up again.

I would LOVE to get her to be more open about her love of anal and work with her to make it a more mutual journey (rather than me leading the way constantly) but she can be quite defensive about sex when not actually aroused and it is more difficult because we still have this "time restricted" play time because of our daughter.

Anyway, I'm here to try and find ways to make that change happen and find a path that makes her pro-actively content about "anal only".

One thing is for sure. Even though my wife has not got back her pre-child figure I am still most turned on when she is face down, ass up, spread and open for me. The thought of that gets me through some difficult times ;)

daftdrafter
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2015 5:52 pm

Re: Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

Post by daftdrafter » Thu Sep 03, 2015 6:11 pm

Sorry forgot to mention that she does have a fairly low sex drive and certainly craves sex less than me. Nonetheless she's VERY into it once going 8-)

curvesnedges
Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Apr 20, 2015 8:44 pm
Location: Georgia

Re: Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

Post by curvesnedges » Tue Sep 08, 2015 5:48 am

Welcome!!
And we hope you find the likeminded crowd here to be comforting and inspiring. If just to create better communication between your wife and you.

Curiosity question: despite the out of balance sex drivesC did you find anal brought you two closer?

daftdrafter
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Sep 03, 2015 5:52 pm

Re: Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

Post by daftdrafter » Tue Sep 08, 2015 3:13 pm

Hurray. This board isn't dead. We've always had anal in our sex life as we both enjoy it. My wife has a lot of "stereotypical" hang-ups about life itself so I think I'm just pushing against tradition and "normality" with her. It is only "in the moment" when these hang-ups can be hung-up. We have our good moments and our bad moments but I don't think I would say it has bought us closer. Potentially as I my wife has recently discovered her love of buttplugs (but will only wear it briefly as foreplay....but it really does get her going....and is quite big (5.5" circumference)).

I think that we might see a little more relaxing and enjoyment once we have the little one out of our bedroom and more "us" time. We adore our daughter but there really is a natural time to boot them out (if you choose this version of parenting) and, for me, it is now (I'll be the one worrying though ;) ).

curvesnedges
Posts: 21
Joined: Mon Apr 20, 2015 8:44 pm
Location: Georgia

Re: Anal only (by accident...it would seem) for 4 years

Post by curvesnedges » Wed Sep 09, 2015 6:21 am

Those little ones can be quite the libido dampeners.

That's why there are more than one room in most houses ... and backseats... And secluded wooded areas off trails. Mmmm. Bent over a tree.


Ahem. Uh. Where were we?

-E

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