After much deliberation I came to the conclusion that I can't find her online, I can't find her in bars, I can't find her through social connections and I just can't find her period years and years of searching wasted. This is the only place other then porn that women are into aol. There is no personals post pages here to help either. Either all of this is a complete lie or I'm the only guy like this.
I am better off being a hermit and cutting off all contact from the world and getting a Vasectomy to kill off all my desires that have ruined my life. I am unable to find her, I just can't find her. Good bye everyone.
In the end though, keep in mind that modern dating is hard. The old social networks of the past have fallen by the way side or disappeared completely. We're now competing with the attention that people get from social media and smartphones have given people the attention span of mayflies. And the abundance of online dating can cause fear of making an actual choice. What if a better partner is just around the corner? Choice paralysis basically.
It's tough and frustrating too. But one must keep trying:
"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall" -Confucius
Instead I agree with Annomundi: maybe it's the strategy that needs a focus:
"Madness is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results" -Einstein
So good luck both to you and me, but don't give up! The future is unpredictable. Moreover here plenty of people are willing to help and share their experice. Discomfort is human. Let it pass and then awake looking at the problem from a different prospective. This is the key in many occasions, I got the proof myself!
Learn how to do it the right way!
Me just like you am shy to treat with women un person, so I been always treating with then on Internet.
After finishing one of my relationship because of no anal only, I joined Badoo because of a colleague who remembered me that page when he showed me using it. A woman sent me a message, now she's my wife and we have a family. I fell in love with her because she always remarked me that she would be always ready for anything I ask her on bed. Unexpectedly we become anal only very soon because the first time we made love, we tried anal right then and she liked it just like vaginal.
After two months of relationship she told me we will make love anal only. Then she was asking me to make it vaginal, I think because she was missing it sometimes, but I demanded her to be anal only. I saw she was not too confort but after a lot of time I think of her and offered my dick un her pussy and unexpectedly she rejected and told me she doesn't like vaginal anymore and even it's unconfort and sometimes painful.
So my friend the best thing is to negotiate with women. Everything la "talkeable" or I don't know the correct word but I think you understand.
When I joined that site once, in preferences I posted that I was looking for an anal only girl. Many messages appeared in my inbox later on. And it's not bullshit, in my country Chile this site appeared on public TV because is a site for cheaters and special people, married people join to look for adventures and people like me to find what we are looking for. It's a paid site, I didn't paid because I was just trying it but to send messages you need a subscription.
Then there's a very mentioned site here I don't remember the name, people look for what they want in there to. Look for that site in this forum, try both and I assurr you that you will find your anal soul mate. But I hope that you already found her.