Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

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Gapeseeker
Posts: 92
Joined: Sat Mar 07, 2020 2:19 pm
Gender: Male
Location: Ontario canada

Re: Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

Post by Gapeseeker » Fri May 06, 2022 9:08 am

French Lover wrote:
Sun Sep 09, 2018 9:06 pm
Women's duty is not to feed children and provide sex to their husband. That's very sexist.

I beg to differ
If she doesn’t take care of you, another women will….

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French Lover
Posts: 207
Joined: Wed Oct 16, 2013 12:21 pm
Location: Paris, France

Re: Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

Post by French Lover » Mon May 23, 2022 10:25 pm

Bullshit justifying infidelity over couple discussion

Anrgator
Posts: 4
Joined: Sun May 22, 2022 9:59 am
Gender: Male

Re: Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

Post by Anrgator » Tue May 24, 2022 6:24 am

Selffister88 wrote:
Sat Sep 08, 2018 4:18 pm
Thanks for the reply
While our lack of sex is partly to avoid pregnancy. It’s more because she isn’t very “into it”. Too tired from looking after two kids and the house.
Plus I have a new theory after hearing a podcast on sexuality. Her sex drive maybe very stimulus based, she may not feel like sex till it’s already underway and she’s turned on. Where I am very spontaneous in my arrousal, so seemingly nothing will make me horny.

She has fingered me a bunch of times. And she’s ok with me using anal toys.
I’ve just got to try harder to make a couple of stress free days and relaxing evenings without the kids to have a chance at sex... and once that’s more regular, anal sex!

You’ve got bigger issues here. Plenty of couples with kids have a good sex life. Kids are no excuse. Claiming “tired” is an excuse. Her not being in the mood for sex typically falls into 2 categories: Possibly a hormonal imbalance or you’re not making her feel the way she wants to feel in her eyes.

I’d say you need to have a real conversation with her. No accusations, nothing to set her on the defense. But sexual frustration usually leads to infidelity or divorce. See a marriage counselor if you need to. Not getting pregnant is also an excuse, IMO. Birth control, from certain religious perspectives is understandable, however absurd I think they are. But what about a vasectomy? Condoms? To ruin a marriage over such things is baffling to me. I’d suspect there’s a larger concern at play, because these are all things happy couples regularly work through.

Buttgirl22
Posts: 6
Joined: Thu Nov 10, 2022 1:17 am
Gender: Female

Re: Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

Post by Buttgirl22 » Thu Nov 10, 2022 1:40 pm

Hey, I didn’t read all the comments here so hopefully not a double up, but my husband and I were in a similar position with our sex life but the difference is I’m open to an AO lifestyle.

My suggestion would be to bring up the idea of edging whether alone or with you. Kind of make a game of her exploring pleasure but definitely NOT cumming.

Edging will increase her interest in sex and sexual exploration. And then bring up the idea of something sexy and sensual like a massage where you rub her back and shoulders and her butt, and between her butt cheeks. Don’t linger there though, just allow her to experience the sensations.

Then ask her how she felt about the massage later. Ask her if she would like that feeling again.
You are obviously into anal and experienced. She might find that intimidating.
You will have to move very slow. Don’t start with suggesting anal play, start with even more tame ways to explore anal sensations

Colt1911
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Re: Male into anal, but wife isn’t :(

Post by Colt1911 » Thu Nov 10, 2022 8:57 pm

Buttgirl22 wrote:
Thu Nov 10, 2022 1:40 pm
Hey, I didn’t read all the comments here so hopefully not a double up, but my husband and I were in a similar position with our sex life but the difference is I’m open to an AO lifestyle.

My suggestion would be to bring up the idea of edging whether alone or with you. Kind of make a game of her exploring pleasure but definitely NOT cumming.

Edging will increase her interest in sex and sexual exploration. And then bring up the idea of something sexy and sensual like a massage where you rub her back and shoulders and her butt, and between her butt cheeks. Don’t linger there though, just allow her to experience the sensations.

Then ask her how she felt about the massage later. Ask her if she would like that feeling again.
You are obviously into anal and experienced. She might find that intimidating.
You will have to move very slow. Don’t start with suggesting anal play, start with even more tame ways to explore anal sensations

Good advice. I may have suggested he focus on teasing her ass too much. My approach has always been to make her crave anal. To your point, it takes time to get there. It took us 36 years!

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